69
by L'Archel-Hotishi
Summary: Emil asks everyone in his party what their favorite number is. Tenebrae's is sixty nine...for awful reasons. Crack, implied Lloyd x Colette. Takes place during the second game.


Title: 69

Rating: T

Pairing: None, this is pure comedy. Please have a good sense of humor and don't flame me. Implied Lloyd x Colette…somewhat.

Disclaimer: ToS:KoR isn't mine, and if you know that the title means, then know I wasn't the one to come up with it.

Author's Notes: I thought of one thing when I was reminded of this joke…TENEBRAE. This fanfic is for those who have a sense of humor, if you don't know what 69 is...I guess you'll find out. This was a huuuuuuuge joke in my school for about two weeks...so I couldn't resist.

Enjoy~!!!! Yay!

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It pays to know the people you're traveling with, especially if the journey you're all on is a particularly long and tedious one. It's important to know the facts and the interests of you're companions. Emil, the new Knight of Ratatosk had asked every one in the book. What's your favorite color? What's your favorite food? What's your favorite animal (Or monster, heck, even Summon Spirit), but all the answers seemed pretty normal or oddly obvious to the blonde teen. Until one day when Marta, Tenebrae, and Colette were venturing around the Asgard Ruins, he asked a question that pushed him straight into the lion's den. "Hey Colette, what's your favorite number?"

"Me?" She asked, looking at him with a surprised face. "Well…I don't really have one. I mean, if I did, wouldn't I hurt all the other numbers' feelings?"

That threw Emil, Marta, and even Tenebrae for a curve. "I…don't think you can do that Collette…" Emil said in one swift sigh, suddenly regretting he had asked such a clumsy and caring person like her that question. He turned to Marta before Collette could say anymore. "W-What about you Marta?"

"Well…" she thought, blue eyes staring up at the ceiling of the cave and her fingers tracing a path down the side of her cheek all the way down to her chin. She hummed in thought until she stopped and finally came to a conclusion. "Like they always say, three is the magic number! I guess that's my favorite. You Emil?"

"Well…I've always liked the number eighteen. I don't know why…it just seems like a pretty normal number…there's nothing really special about it." Suddenly, Emil paled and his eyes widened like he was coming to a realization. "Maybe it's because I relate to it…"

"That's not true!" Brunell cried loudly. "You're great, funny, cool, and super smart!" Emil blushed and nodded, scratching the back of his head in embarrassment while Marta's glare bore into the back of his neck. "Emil…"

"You really think so Colette?"

"I know so, oh Tenebie, what's your…"

"Sixty nine," the Centurion said bluntly, chuckling after he answered. Marta saw him laugh and started to wonder what was up. She pushed past the Chosen and Knight and kneeled down to meet Tenebrae's eyes. "What…why sixty nine?" Tenebrae held back another snicker and turned away from Lualdi, masking his face with a paw. "It's-It's nothing at a-all…nothing…pffft….hahaha!" Now it had evolved into a hysterical laugh.

Hello, I'm a red flag, nice to meet you.

"Why is Tenebie laughing like that.? It must be really funny!"

"C'mon Tenebrae, tell us!" Emil pried, sitting on the ground and leaning closer to the Centurion of Darkness. Colette joined and leaned over the blonde's shoulder, smiling sweetly at the black doggie. "Yes, please Tenebie?"

"Well…"

Guys!" Marta yelled, cupping a hand over Tenebrae's mouth. "Let's not ask. I mean, it has to be pretty disturbing to make Tenebrae laugh like that. Personally, I don't want to be traumatized and stuck with him at the same time…" Emil and Colette completely ignored the brunette and kept interrogating Tenebrae, trying to crack him like a cheap piece of pottery. "Please…"

"Well…alright. Lay the sixty nine down flat so that the two numbers are on top of one another. Now, pretend that those two numbers are actually people…"

The only sound made was the sound of wind rushing through the old walls of the ruins. Bells could be heard ringing in the distance, but other than that, there was nothing but awkward, eerie silence. "Tenebrae! That's so…so gross! No way, you can't be serious!" Marta stomped her foot loudly and watched Tenebrae almost roll over from laughing so hard. "Lady Marta…do you not find it amusing?"

"NO, YOU PERVERTED OLD MAN!"

Emil blushed the color of crimson roses and turned away, trying to find something that could possible make him forget Tenebrae's cruel joke. Colette, on the other hand, was as oblivious as ever. "I…don't get it. Why would you hold someone upside-down?" Marta slapped her forehead and went off with Emil (now in Ratatosk Mode) to fight a monster. "What…why? Hey Tenebie, why would you do that?"

"I'm sure someone will show you eventually…" He chuckled softly and vanished again, leaving a very puzzled Colette alone to ponder the mysteriousness of the number sixty-nine.

"Someone…hmm…once I find Lloyd, I'll ask him…"

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Short, crappy, but I NEEDED TO WRITE IT. It was mandatory, like the Thanksgiving Day Parade…(pictures ToS cast riding on giant floats.) Can you imagine a Tenebie balloon? Lolz.

Please review and, once again, this wasn't my joke and I didn't come up with it. :D


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